Its so weird for me, I am finding things and doing things that are making me happy, but i made many mistakes along the way (I am in trouble rn), I am both happy, sad, mad, but mostly happy. When I found the one big thing that made me happy, it gave me more anxiety, both good and bad. Before I found him, I was an absolute mess, where I had only bad anxiety, I couldn’t sleep, and I just generally didn’t feel happy, like as if was in a deep lonely hole. Plus to top it all off, I am only 14, like, what? I don’t feel like I should be, or should have been feeling like. That.
It sucked, it still sucks, well, less now.
I forgot what else I was going to type so I will either create a new topic or edit/reply to this one for an update.
(Edit) The feeling of anxiety, I believe, will always be there, some days I have close to none, some days it lasts the entire day. Like Logic says, Anxiety is here “to make you appreciate the moments ‘I’m’ not around” And I do, because those moments where my anxiety isn’t around, I feel happy, grateful, and almost “ecstatic” in a way. I love feeling that way, but Logic also talks about having an anxiety attack/panic attack.
Woosh slight topic change
I’ve never had a big panic attack, only small ones, and they are rare. When they do happen, I always feel like my stomach just is dying, like I am dying, sort of. Its a terrible feeling, and the worst part about is that I don’t think I talk about having anxiety or my slight panic attacks enough. I have talked about it kind of slightly with my mother and my step-father, but I don’t think I have ever talked about it with my own father.