When I was five #blacklivesmatter

When I was five, I realized that I didn’t want to be black anymore.

Let me break that down for you.

At the tender age of five I knew that black people were not loved, but hated. Black people were the equivalent to furniture- to animals. Black people were always the aggressors. Black people were always associated with violence, hatred, and anger.

And it took me years to love my skin, while watching my sisters and brothers die for innocent crimes. Locked up, for crimes they didn’t commit. Our words of outrage being ignored. People have not listening to what we have been yelling ever since my great-great-great-grandmother was a child.

You don’t know how it feels to grow up, with your parents teaching you how to respond to law enforcement when you are approached. Not letting you leave to go hang out with friends until the speech was memorized without a single stutter and with complete eye contact.

You don’t know how scared I was of the world at five. I knew that a group of people already hated me, and I didn’t do nothing wrong.

That my life may end, due to a hate crime.

But then, people started to turned around.

For years we have been yelling for people to turn around and listen- and it happened at the death of an innocent black man.

I’m not happy that another life was lost in order to be the catalyst of a movement, but I am happy that people are finally noticing that black people have been treated this way.

Thank you to everyone who has shown their support. It’ll take time for the walls of racism to finally be broken down, but it’s a start.

I’m sure my five year old self would be very happy.


i have felt the same way, i don’t want to be scared to go out, i don’t want to be assumed i am stealing things, i want to be equal with everyone else, is that too much to ask for? i’m glad this all started so we can be heard so they take us seriously. :heart:


:heart: This is a strong message and story. Thank you for sharing. It’s hard to hear for many who haven’t had those struggles, but we all need to wake up to this reality for African Americans in this country. Fight until law enforcement are held accountable and fight all forms of institutional and systemic racism. I stand with y’all. No one and no race should be treated the way y’all have.




Crying because I literally just told @Dollpower that I used to be afraid of being black. Like I didn’t want to be because growing up I was teased so much for the color of my skin, that I thought it was ugly. Can you believe that! Black, ugly? I could never. Black is beautiful. We are beautiful. My melanin glowing Kings and Queens I SEE YOU! We’re black. We’re bold. And we’re fucking beautiful. Little me is holding little you’s hand and they are crying with some tears of joy because of all the support from EVERYONE now. It’s not just us out there. People finally stepping in and figuring it out that people shouldn’t be dying over their SKIN COLOR. Yeah it’s a little late, but I’ll take anything that goes towards the progression of ending racism and police brutality against black people and other minorities but in this moment, BLACK PEOPLE.



Feel this 100%. Use to hate being black. I’ve experienced racism all my life. Feeling uncomfortable every time the police came around. I understand the looting is questionable, but we’ve been protesting for years with little progress and people want to make light of George’s death by making moral arguments against the rioting? SMH


Black built this country through slave labor, and those family lineages are still around. Generation after generation of living in a country that they couldn’t even be a part of; it shatters my mind, it makes me so angry that I can’t sit in my apartment and complain. I must act. @rommie, my heart is broken for your past—you are absolutely right, black is beautiful. Black is human! Humans are beautiful creatures, especially when we work together. I am tired of hoping for change and waiting for a better future for my fellow Americans. And now, during pride month, I feel even more mournful. I will have the memory of Marsha P. Johnson in my mind all month. There is a history of black queer activists that we owe a lot to. Black lives absolutely matter. When black lives matter, all lives will matter.


The last part gave me chills. “When black lives matter, all lives will matter.”

The power in the sentence.

Thank you so much for your words, evyn.


Kind reminder to everyone replying, lets stick to the main topic of this thread and try not to deter from that into other off topic arguments. Thanks!


I don’t like being labeled a color period. Being mixed I was either a n-lover and had enough back features that whites didn’t like and I was light skinned enough blacks didn’t care for me either I was felt as a useless mutt…


This post is about @satturnny tho and her POV and I wanna respect that because it was beautifully written sis. :heart:


Thank you for sharing such a personal story with us. These stories need to be told and heard and amplified. Because so many people have no clue what black people in America, and around the world, face on a daily basis. Just one day in your shoes would wake a lot of people up.


I was talking to my friend’s mom about all the protesting and she did not know what I was talking about. She also didn’t know about Floyd or Taylor. My friend yelled at her own mom (which was weird) and then her mom apologized to me.

I get the whole “I didn’t know black people were going through all this,” all the time.

But just in case you (meaning whoever is reading this) didn’t know- Black people have been going through this for decades. Just because slavery ended, does not mean people like us. Lynch threats are a thing and they are terrifying.

I could go on and on about the encounters I’ve had (I live near Atlanta but I used to live further down south) and racist people follow you everywhere like a shadow. At the age of six, I was accused of stealing from a lady I’ve never seen before- and she called the cops!

I used to think being black was a burden and it took me forever to change ‘burden’ to ‘blessing’. I wouldn’t want anyone to go through the things my family had to endure, but it made us stronger.

But I’m so happy- beyond words- that people are finally fighting for us.


It makes me so sad that you have to endure such hate from all these bigoted people in the world, you are such a lovely, creative person.

When I was a kid my best friend was black, so from an early age I witnessed some of the horrible, racist crap he endured. I didn’t really understand it then, or why, but I still remember how angry it made me feel, and still does. When I came out I got a little taste of bigotry myself. But nothing like my childhood friend.

I truly hope this becomes like the “me too” movement for the horrible injustices black people have had perpetrated on them by a system and culture that has racism embedded in every fiber. So many more people are finally waking up. The man who murdered George Floyd broke the last straw. IMO, it took WAY too long. But no compassionate, decent person can see all these videos of police brutality and continue to ignore it anymore. :hearts: