The abuse on Byte needs to end

General Discussion
#1

:bangbang:POSSIBLE TW PLEASE DON’T READ IF YOU ARE IN A VULNERABLE STATE OF MIND:bangbang:

I go by the name of @stinkysteff on byte and over the past few days, I’ve seen a lot of toxic behaviour. It’s beyond upsetting to see… Byte should be a place of acceptance however I am terrified to post because I’m scared of refreshing my page and seeing 4+ comments about how i’m disgusting.

I used to wake up every morning and happily get ready for my next byte, i used to love making content. However, when i open the app now i see nothing but abuse, body shaming and arguments. It makes me fearful of this app.

I’ve been in a really bad state for the past 5 years. At school I was heavily bullied and beaten due to my weight and general style, this forced me into dropping out at just the age of 15 (I’m almost 18 now). As i have no grades or anything, i’ve been doing nothing for the past 2 years. I would just waste away in bed. I was miserable.

This year my mentality has been at an all time low. I would cry myself to sleep every night, my throat would be scratched, my head would pound and my eyes were bloodshot constantly. I felt as if i was going insane, as if my head was about to burst…

During lockdown I saw an advert for byte on Instagram, saying that alt people were welcome etc. I remember feeling my legs tremble. Have I finally found a place where i belonged?
I quickly downloaded it and customised my account, all of the posts were so positive. Everyone was new and friendly. The older Byters were welcoming and helped us understand, I quickly became obsessed with the app. I found something to believe in.

Everything was going well until about a week or 2 ago one of my videos blew up insanely. This evidently meant that all the cruel people started commenting nasty things :roll_eyes: I tried to report every single one of them however they just kept coming over and over again. At first it didn’t bother me. However, as the comments got more frequent it became harder to ignore.

This week, the abuse I’ve seen others and myself get is disgusting. Everyone is arguing, insulting each other and even accusing each other of doing malicious things. It’s overall horrible to see.

IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH SOMEONE WHO SPEAK TO REGULARLY ON BYTE, FIX IT TOGETHER PRIVATELY!!! WHAT YOU’RE SAYING ONLINE AFFECTS OTHERS TOO

These sort of posts are overwhelmingly frustrating to see, it makes my stomach ache. It makes me depressed

I just want to know what you guys think about the toxic behaviour on this app, I’m sorry this post is pretty long, I just have a lot in my head.
Stay strong, i love you :heart:

14 Likes
#2

From my experience, everywhere someone might go, hate would follow along with em.
You look to your left, oop there goes a mean comment
You look to the right and oop there goes more mean comments.
Trust me I know what people can say and do will end up being hurtful. But at the same time, there are people who are out there that do care about you and will want the best for you. Those are the kind of people you need to focus on. Ignoring ignorant people is just a better wave. Don’t let them get to you. I hope you find happiness with good people in your life and not the toxic ones that will pop up here and there in your life.
I’m not sure if this is what you wanted to hear but keep your head up. Things will get better :relieved:

9 Likes
#3

@KinglyNerd thank you so much! I tens to focus on the more negative side of things and its really hard to deal with stuff like that especially because of my past :pleading_face: ilysm, thank you

7 Likes
#4

Hey man, I just wanted to let you know that I understand the pain you feel from these toxic, useless, agonizing comments. Truth is, the nasty comments that people leave speak a lot more about them than you. If their lives are callous and sad enough that they’ll actually take the time to do nothing but spew hatred to others, that’s a problem with them. Don’t take criticism from people you wouldn’t take advice from, especially people who just want to do nothing but destroy and create agony. Misery likes company.

We know you’re better than the type of person who would do something like that. If you can, don’t worry about those comments because they come from people who likely only scorn others because of deficiencies or insecurities they feel within themselves, or a general lack of love in their life. Sometimes reaching out a helping hand can change a life, or even just a day, but of course there are those who choose not to reciprocate those actions. And that’s okay, because it’s out of your control. It’s only on them, not you. You’re good, man, you’re good. Best of luck to you and I hope the app feels like a home again soon. :green_heart:

10 Likes
#5

long post incoming

I have noticed some hateful comments on your posts, and it is hard to ignore. My account has also had some hate comments this week, and my team just posts content that is submitted to us so that goes to show they just want to find the slightest reason to hate. Around 8 months ago, I was kind of in your shoes. By that I mean I was in a really bad mental state and didn’t really know what to do with my life.

Just when I thought nothing could really get worse in life, something in my personal life happened and it brought me down a lot. When that happened, I became more and more depressed and sad. I would barely smile for anything (I use to always smile). I had friends to help me along the way, and with that I decided to make a team with my friend Kate on TikTok (yes, the dreaded app we all hate).

We grew on the app so I brought more friends into the team and it became a 8 member team that posts content we asked permission to post. Some members left, and some stayed. We dedicated the team to entertain others to brighten their day, and we try to brighten days as much as we can. With us growing so much, people actually started submitting their own clips so we’re not really seen asking for clips anymore (we still do, but rarely). What helped me the most is seeing how many loved when we posted new content. What that showed me was that people cared for us without even seeing us. I’m not saying to not show yourself, or to start a team, I’m saying to focus on the people that care for when you post and are always there for when you post.

If you ever feel down, or if you just want to smile, you can check out my account (@ague) on Byte and we post around every 3 hours funny/wholesome clips that will most likely brighten your day. You can also DM me on here or IG if you ever want to just talk to someone.

2 Likes
#6

One thing I’d like to focus on is being solution oriented. The thing is, the toxic people aren’t on the forums. They are trolls. They have always existed. They are not here to self improve. They want other people to be as low as them. Instead of creating, they get joy in tearing you down. Your call for toxicity to stop is noble, but you’re speaking to a niche of toxic people who aren’t here and wouldnt care to listen.

So what do we as positive members do? If you see it, report and block. Literally any actual response to them even if you block and report after responding is a victory to them. Learn to not take the negativity as strongly as the positivity. They aren’t personally attacking you, but they are attacking you as part of their own insecurities. You can’t entirely hide from or avoid it and you have to rise above it. JUST REPORT AND BLOCK.

What should we avoid? Do not respond in any way. Treat them as ghosts. Do not validate them in any way for being negative. Do not witch hunt with forum posts targeting specific trolls. Avoid making larger posts like this in general. Again, this is validation that what they does works.

The positive feedback you get is real, and from real people. Build on those. The negative feedback is from empty shells of accounts. Don’t treat them as humans, because they are not giving you that respect. Treat them like a bot. Block and report.

6 Likes
#7

@arf thank you so so much! I have always been extremely critical of myself ever since i was a kid and just seeing comments that agree with what I was already thinking hurts a great bunch :frowning:
I will do my best to ignore it and just live my life. Thank you :sparkling_heart:

2 Likes
#8

@ague thank you so much! I also received some news this year and it just felt like a kick in the teeth. I never thought things could get even worse.
I’ve been very critical of myself ever since i was a kid so seeing comments that agreed with my own insecurities is just so horrible face. :frowning:
I do have a few byte friends who help me a lot through the negativity. I should focus more on that than the few comments i get about the way i look.
Again, thank you :slight_smile::sparkling_heart:

2 Likes
#9

@Beeshrine thank you! I normally can handle comments from them however theres a point where they just cross the line. Even seeing real accounts and real people argue and accuse each other on my mix page is horrible to see, it just stresses me out. I came to byte to clear my mind, not see the creators i love in heated arguments with more creators.
My mix just makes me miserable now :frowning:
I definitely report and block but its really entertaining to see them get angry if i reply with a kind comment or something.

1 Like
#11

Nah dude. Do not blame the victim here. You can’t expect everyone to have thick skin, nor is that the best thing to do.

3 Likes
#12

I agree something need to be done.

1 Like
#13

Wow! I love this so much. I say this repeatedly about up-and-coming political figures that are just trolling to get a platform. I can’t believe I never thought to apply this to my actual life when people troll me personally. Like. I’m hoping this is not coming off sarcastically because this truly is an eye-opening experience for me. I’ve always heard that people who like to tear others down are saying more about themselves than about me (although that doesn’t erase the hurt, and sometimes I downright can’t get myself to believe that those people have insecurities (especially if they’re super hot or whatever)), but learning to treat them as a bot or an empty shell is new to me and quite frankly refreshing. Why? Because doing so is not necessarily mean to them, so we aren’t stooping down to their level. It’s just… smart. I like it. I like it a lot! :slightly_smiling_face:

Thanks, @Beeshrine!

2 Likes
#14

I am glad this has helped. I watched a video recently that talked about this a lot, and the anonymity of the internet allows people to take a stance on an argument whether they truly believe it or not. Engaging them is pointless if you can’t tell if they are even serious, and if you could tell them why they are wrong, the argument will twist into something different where they will continue to believe they are not wrong.

Online harassment is very tough on creators and I can’t just say “don’t let it bother you”, but all of us should work on engaging with the positivity and letting those people’s opinions weigh more than the shadow insults.

1 Like
#15

Empty coconut shells are great as firewood. We use it all the time in my olde country.

2 Likes
#16

just blame the tik tok community, most of the hate comments on byte that i saw for the past 9 months were mostly based on the tiktokers.

2 Likes