Sensitive Subject, please refrain from trolling and such. If you are uncomfortable with suicide/depression and suicide prevention information, please back out of thread. Thanks.
In a society where suicide and depression rates are rising and in light of the recent failure to help those with mental health issues (I,e. Parkland) I’ve taken it upon myself to spread a message of hope to those struggling.
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
If you are in need of immediate help please call that number. It personally helped me and I’ll explain.
My battle with depression started when I was 14 years old. Certain events in my life started unfolding and while they’ve made me stronger, at the time they were extremely hard. I lost people I loved, I was having personal issues with my family, my grades were dropping, and I was being bullied very badly at school. A lot of people would say that’s nothing more than the average person, but for me it was a lot. I turned all my focus to baseball as a means of help, and for a year or so it helped. I was an All-State Catcher and I had offers from community colleges and junior colleges as just a sophomore in HS. Then I shattered my thumb and I could no longer properly squeeze with my glove hand, and as a catcher that’s a major deal. So I had to quit. Now I had nothing and nobody. So. I turned to drugs to fill that void. It was the worst mistake of my life, I started to spiral quickly downward to the point where my entire life felt like a black hole. Everything I did ended up ruined or screwed up.
So I decided to make a terrible decision to attempt suicide. It wasn’t easy and as soon as I started the attempt I knew I screwed up, but I couldn’t fix it. I was going to OD. That was my plan. But by some miracle I didn’t die… the thoughts of failure began to flood my mind. How was I so bad at life that I couldn’t even do suicide right? That’s when I realized I NEEDED help. I contacted the hotline and they talked to me and encouraged me and did actually save my life that day. I began to try an surround my negative environment with positive actions and it really gave me a new feeling on life. Sure, everyone was falling apart. But I can control how I respond and I decided that day to try and respond in a positive motion.
That’s just a very brief explanation of what happened to me and I want anyone out there who is struggling with this to know. It can get better if you want it to get better.
Please, call that number if you are struggling. If you don’t feel comfortable talking to someone over the phone, please feel free to message me on here or on my Instagram/Twitter @nethantownsend (for both)
If someone you know is going through this please help them. Don’t sit back and let them make a terrible decision.
Thank you guys for listening and always know there is hope. You are worth it.
Much Love <3